Monday, April 20, 2009

Range Report:

Well, today was my reminder on how much I hate Glocks. My company had it’s annual firearms qualifications today (as I write this, yesterday as I post it) and that got topped off by the cleaning process.

You want the truth? Yeah, I shot like shit. You see, the Glock doesn’t fit me. The grip angle places my wrist in a slight downward angle that I dislike. It was cold, it was raining, I was tired, I wanted a fresh cup of coffee and a hot shower and 8 hours of sleep since as I write this, I’m at work.

Now, my biggest issue (like I need any more issues) is this. Why does a company issue a handgun for duty use that you cannot practice with sufficiently to become actually proficient? I get about 45 rounds a year with this damn thing. The other several thousand rounds I fire, come out of a 1911. Whole different feel, whole different manual of arms. Different POI, it’s just a totally different animal. Oh, did I mention that the duty ammo this company gives us is 9mm SWC? I think that should tell you something.

There’s no way, on my best day, that I could hit a Mozambique drill at 25 yards with this stupid thing, hell, it was issued to me brand new, it has less than 150 rounds through it, it’s not even broken in yet. I put 1000 through my 1911 in just the first week I had it.

Then on top of that, like I said, tired, cold and wet and wanting coffee, shower and sleep before work, I was having grip issues, I was trigger slapping. It was just friggin miserable performance on my part.

Now the topper, I have to clean it.

Who was the tiny fingered homo pansy that designed the take down system on this fuckin thing? I can’t hardly get the fucking buttons down, because they’re so small, I can’t get my fingers engaged properly. Twist and turn and pull and push and swear like the sailor I was 25 years ago and I finally get it apart. It took me longer to take it down than it did to actually clean and lube it.

Did I mention how much I hate Glocks yet?

I actually enjoy cleaning my 1911; I even enjoy cleaning my AR. Cleaning a Glock? Fuck Glocks and the gay cross-dressing cocksucker that invented them, that miserable bastard wouldn’t make a pimple on John Moses Browning’s ass. Not even the scent of Hoppe’s could make this better. Come on guys, you all know that the only thing on this planet the smells better than Hoppe’s is Brigid’s kitchen and still, not even that could possibly make me forget the sheer hatred I feel at taking down a fucking Glock.

Thank the Goddess that’s over and done now. It’s all cleaned and lubed up with Brian Enos’ Slide Glide lite and back in the holster. And sitting on the damn desktop because if anyone wants to shoot me, they have to get through 2 other guards with guns, plus 2 military guys with guns AND break down 2 magnetically locked steel doors. I think I might be ready for him by then.

Now since I mentioned it, you have tried Slide Glide haven’t you? My 1911 and AR cycle beautifully. I highly recommend it. I’ve been using it for a couple of months now and so far, it does everything Brian says it does.


Mad Jack said...

I don't believe it. A man who hates Glocks. All this time I've been thinking I'm all alone out here.

I own a Springfield 1911 Mil Spec which I really like. I also have a Springfield V-16 Long Slide, which kicks like a .38, eats anything I feed it and hammers one after another into the bull's eye, providing my mother's favorite son isn't jerking the trigger.

When Obama moved into the White House I celebrated by ordering a Rock River AR-15 flat top along with a decent Weaver scope.

I'm going to try Slide Glide, because any man who hates the Glock is guaranteed to have two good ideas per year. I keep reading your blog and watching for the second idea.

Warthog said...

You musta missed the part where I said I owned a springer mil spec myself, LOL.

I'm also secretly in love with Brigid, but don't tell anyone.